Getting real and keeping the faith?

I'm looking forward to the release of Pete Greig's latest work 'God on Mute'. I've had many (many) heated discussions with Mr worthington surrounding this one - why if we are promised healing from the man that took sickness in every lashing, do friends still die of cancer. Why, if my brother is covered by the blood and is an inheritor of freedom, is he suffering month on month, and now year upon year.

I have my 'head' stance - that truth is in the word and that present circumstances are just temporary facts. I know my God is big enough. I know every theory and believe me we've covered them and tried them all. Don't tell me God brings these things to teach us and grow us. My God is the God of life and wholeness, he won't instigate this sickness and suffering. I know Him. And I have seen his power and his miricles.

That established, where I'm at does not even fit into words let alone rational thoughts. All i can do is scream at heaven: WHY? why is he still so bound? why is he not free after the first petition so many months ago? why when we tell this mountain to move does it not jump? why can't we hear your thoughts on this issue Jesus. endless whys...

And still, everyday i go home and he's not healed.

What i see conflicts with everything i believe. there aren't easy answers though everyone has one. Hello - it's not meant to be like this.

This I know, and has not been moved. Somewhere in the middle of this, Jesus is so powerful. He has not changed, his presence is more than real, his love is unshaken and I Trust Him. that's all the answer i have left. He is all I'l ever need, He is good, He never leaves and His heart is bigger and deeper and older and fresher than any of ours. It is (with)in Him that I need to be.